I think ChessTalk (when it is UP) has a decent amount of visits and web traffic (it isn't amazon.ca but it is a little on the busy side)
so the key thing is to find a host service that is more responsive and helpful than Lunarpages seems to be... I think Christian mentioned
to me once that Lunarpages is not in our time zone (to say the least) so that makes the response loop even worse than necessary, so
I would add another requirement: the host service needs to have business hours that correspond to Toronto/Montreal/Ottawa time.
Whether the host uses VPS (virtual servers) or even real hardware is not the problem here I think...
For what its worth, running your own internet-facing server is not for the faint-hearted - there are all sorts of issues that need to be addressed (security,
isolation from the rest of the internal network etc. being two of the most important).